A sinner's unwilling confession

i'm always the one that think of other people's sake first before considering what are the consequences that i'm gonna face....but why people just misinterpret my thoughts all the time??
i tried so hard to gain everybody's faith in me...but i ended up being the dumb-est freak that existed...being intimidated once and forgive is counted kind hearted...being intimidated the second time and still forgive is counted as dumb...i still ponder...how dumb can i be??should i make my own stand and fight all my curses or shall i just sit down silently and continue being intimidate??my guardian angels chosen the first choice but i just don't have the guts to do so...i'm not along side with the majorities...well..it seems like i have to hide back in my shell till the shell is being triggered again...live in a sin when ur not a sinner is so frustrating...